March 24, 2012

Table For Three

The weeks leading up to Crosbi's arrival, Todd and I were intentional about fitting in a weekly brunch. I treasured those dates, just the two of us. I was so worried that having a baby would mean the end to our spontaneous weekend visits to new restaurants and cafes. Thankfully I was wrong!

I never could have imagined our weekends would only get better. It's so much fun to watch Crosbi take in her surroundings. Brunch dates are much sweeter with her around. 

This morning Todd and I tried a new place, the West End Cafe located on West End (obviously) in downtown Nashville. Great location, good food and an awesome atmosphere. I just wish we lived a bit closer. I could see us becoming regulars!

Happy Weekend!

March 19, 2012

Crosbi: 3 Months

What a busy month! I have several blog posts bouncing around in my head, but as usual, if I don't get Crosbi's monthly update written it will never happen. My sweet girl will be four months old this week! Where is the time going?

This month we have had lots of visitors, plus I started my new job. It has been a bit difficult to find time to blog (or keep up with my favorite blogs!). Especially now that Crosbi doesn't wake during the night.

*Weighing in at 17-18 pounds. We'll know for sure at her doctor's appointment this week.
*She may be longer than 24 inches by now. One thing is for sure, she grows out of her clothes faster than I can buy them!
*She's holding her head up like a champ and will now put weight on her legs. She loves to stand.
*She loves watching people talk. When Todd gets home from work and I'm asking about his day, Crosbi will just giggle as we talk to each other. She's sure to remind us that she's part of the conversation too!
*Still my champion sleeper, she's sleeping a fairly consistent nine hours each night. Although last night she gave us ten. We really are lucky.
*She loves people. After having a full house for nearly a week straight, Crosbi didn't mind the change in routine at all. I'm sure it feels strange to her to have a quiet house again.
 *She can roll over! The first time she did it was so exciting. One of those moments when I knew that quitting my job was the best decision. I would have totally missed her rolling. I'm so glad I'll be home to experience all of her milestones!

 Each month just keeps getting better!

March 3, 2012

My New Life (and a conversation with God)

I took a long walk. The breeze was crisp, but not a cloud in the sky. I breathed deeply. It felt nice to be alone with my thoughts and have the sun on my face. Crosbi wouldn't need to eat for at least an hour and I was going to soak in the fresh, spring like air.

I should have been anxious. I should have been going over my to-do list in my mind. So much to do before Monday morning. I should have been feeling bad for taking time for myself, not wanting a single moment away from Crosbi. I should have. But I didn't. It wasn't necessary.

It wasn't necessary because Monday will be like all the other Mondays we've enjoyed these past 14 weeks.

I quit my job.

I could give the long, detailed story as to how I made that decision, and truthfully the simplest and most honest is this: God told me to. But I would be naive to think that everyone who stumbles across this little blog would know what I mean by that. No, he didn't audibly say, "Tara, you must quit your job." But as with most relationships, actions speak much louder than words. So I thought I would document our "conversation" over the past few weeks.

Me: God, I can't do this. I can't leave her. My heart can't take it.
God: I'm not asking you to leave her.
Me: We can't afford it. I've crunched the numbers a thousand times and they just don't add up.
God: Out of nowhere, Todd is offered a new job with his company and a raise.
Me: I just signed up for a flexible spending account for childcare. We will lose a lot of money.
God: HR tells me we will only have to use the small amount we had paid in and it's completely reimbursable.
Me: My job covers all of our insurance and we turned down Todd's plan when Crosbi was born. We can't go the rest of the year uninsured.
God: Todd's HR says his insurance will pick up where mine leaves off.
Me: But we'll still come up short. Really short. I have to contribute something.
God: Our pastor calls, asks if I can work at our church two days a week. With practically free childcare.
Me: But I can't leave the music industry. It's too important to me. Who am I if I can't say I work for Sony?
God: You are My child and Crosbi's mother. Roles that should not be taken lightly.
Me: Speechless.

Isn't God so gracious to provide when we need Him? I don't take for granted this blessing. I know so many moms that would do anything to stay home with their little ones and for whatever reason are not able to. I know I don't deserve this opportunity. All I can offer as a thank you is my full commitment to raise Crosbi to know her Savior. He has called me to an incredibly important role and I don't take it lightly.

Todd and I don't have the perfect life. I don't want to ever come across as if we do. It's not going to be easy with me staying home. We have to cut back a lot. Budgeting has a whole new meaning now. But I'm more than okay with that.

I'm so thankful for this new life. So thankful to spend my days with my girl.

So thankful for a God who knows us better than we know ourselves.