The last two months of my pregnancy I really packed on the pounds and it was evident. Especially in my face. I wrote several times about how insecure I had become, how chubby my cheeks were. I hated having my picture taken. I was so insecure that when I saw someone hold up a camera, it was all I could do to not cry and beg them to not take my picture. Instead I made everyone in the room swear not to post any pictures of me online. I didn't want there to be any evidence of what I had done to myself.
Two months after the birth of my sweet girl, I regret my behavior. No, I don't regret not letting people put my photos online (the whole world didn't need to see my fat face), but I regret that I stopped taking photos of myself entirely. I don't have photos from the last 30ish weeks of my pregnancy. You won't see many of me in the hospital, and Crosbi was five weeks old before I had my first "real" picture taken with her.
When I think about that, I'm saddened. So I've decided to make another New Years resolution. I'm going to be open to any and all pictures with my baby girl. I don't want her flipping through her baby book one day and asking, "Why are there no pictures of Mommy?" More importantly, I don't want to ever have to tell her that there were no pictures because mommy felt fat. That's not the example I want to set for her. So, as part of my new efforts, you may start to see more pictures of me on this blog - chubby face and all.
Without further adieu...
New Years Eve. Crosbi stayed up until midnight to watch the ball drop with us. Such a special moment kissing my two loves as we rang in the new year.
This photo was just taken today. Crosbi made her very first trip to the zoo. Being a mommy is already so much fun. We're going to have a blast visiting the zoo as she grows.
I just love that little girl and am so excited to create many more sweet memories with her.