A new chapter is beginning. It's crazy to think we're beginning a new decade. I woke up this morning feeling different. I can't really describe it. I just sat in my bed wondering what this year would bring. While many things will stay the same, a lot will change too. I have a love/hate relationship with change. I love it when I'm the one changing things, but the unknown scares me. I think this year makes me a bit anxious because I know things will change that I'm not even aware of yet.
Last year was pretty calm for us. I think that's because we needed to be stable so that we could carry those who were facing change (Todd's mom's cancer, my sister's challenges, etc.). The older we get, the more change scares me. I wasn't afraid of moving to Nashville. Buying a house didn't worry me a bit. But this year I'm unsure. I'm not expecting anything big and scary, but because life has been on auto-pilot lately, I have this feeling God may shake things up a bit.
This morning I read my devotional, seeking some insight into how I should face 2010. The first sentence: "Come to Me with a teachable spirit, eager to be changed." Yep, that's what I was afraid of. Tears streamed down my face because I think that change needs to begin with me. I need to give more, serve more and be a better friend. I need to listen more and think about myself less. I need to be aware that my kitchen being clean is far less important than my sister trying to move on from her first serious relationship. I need to change so that those around me are blessed. I need to change so that I can accept the big changes that God brings our way.
I'm also a bit excited. While change can be hard, it has also always brought abundant blessings. I have no reason to be afraid. Why? God says so. "I know the plans I have for you: plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." That is exciting!
So here's to 2010 and the changes it brings. Maybe they will all be internal. That's okay too.
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Enough seriousness. How about a recap of our New Years Eve festivities?!
We spent the evening with our closest friends. Dinner began at our place. One of my favorite places to be is at the dinner table surrounded by those I love.
It also doesn't hurt to attend parties with the most handsome man in the room. (I might be a little biased!)
Happy New Year. Let's make this one the best yet!
You are already a treasure of a friend - I can't wait to see what the Lord does in your heart and your life this coming year. Here's to much joy & peace amidst the change in the days to come.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Thank you for carrying me when I needed it.
Tara, I didn't know Tracy had cancer. I hope she is doing well. We were just talking about her the other day at our class reunion planning party about sending her an invite to our reunion because we are inviting those that changed our lives forever!!! What kind of cancer does she have? Tell her I said "hi".
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