It Takes A Village

 Be very careful never to forget what you have seen the Lord do for you. Do not let these things escape from your mind as long as you live! And be sure to pass them on to your children and grandchildren. - Deuteronomy 4:9

It really does take a village and I'm oh so thankful for mine. It's incredible how powerful words are. The past couple of weeks I have had words shared with me that have stopped me in my tracks, dropped me to my knees, and left me praising my God. All because people who care about me have shared their wisdom and kindness.

When I was pregnant with Crosbi, one of my deepest prayers was that she would find community with women who would lift her up and encourage her, and this week I'm reminded just how important that prayer still is. Not just for me and Crosbi, but now for her little sister. That's right, if you missed it, we're having another girl!

Last week we had our big 20-week ultrasound and discovered that our newest family member is a little girl. The emotions I had about having another girl were all over the place. But God amazed me with his faithfulness. Within minutes my phone was flooded with texts from my mom to best friends to old coworkers who were praying for me and with me, reminding me that God has a perfect plan and that he had always planned for me to be the mom of girls. I had friends share with such vulnerability their thoughts when they first learned the gender of their babies, and I have to say, those words moved mountains for me. God spoke through them to remind me how much he loves me and my family and I went from shock to celebration almost immediately.

Then just yesterday, He did it again. I've shared that adding another child has been a bittersweet reality as I think of how it will change my relationship with Crosbi. I still have days where I'm overcome with fear and sadness when I think of having to divide my time. Yesterday was one of those days. Before I jumped in the shower, I turned on a Taylor Swift playlist and the first song to play was "Never Grow Up." Word to the wise, do NOT listen to that song when you're a 5-month pregnant woman with crazy hormones. I lost it. Sobbed like a baby. All I could think about was how fast the past four years have gone by and how quickly Crosbi is growing up. I thought, will she ever know how much I've loved her during this time? Will she ever understand how much she means to me? (And now I'm crying as I write this...).

As I got out of the shower I heard my phone vibrating and thinking it was Todd, quickly ran to check it. It wasn't Todd, it was my Aunt Terry and her words were so timely that I know without a doubt God was speaking to her for me:

"I wanted to let you know that when I was pregnant, I also wondered how in the world I could ever love another as much as I loved the first...I remember thinking that so well. Believe me, your heart grows big enough to love so much."

What?! Is there a camera in my bathroom? How did she know? I told her I was literally just having a breakdown and her timing couldn't have been more perfect. I also told her my fears that Crosbi won't know how much I love her. Her response:

"You're correct. Crosbi will not know how much you love her until the day she has a child of her own. On that day she will know."

Cue tears forever.

But just like that, her words struck my heart and I knew God was comforting me with them. One of the greatest ways for me to deal with my fear is to know that I'm not alone. I don't know a single woman who hasn't expressed some sadness or worry about how adding another child will change their family. It means even more when they encourage me with their own stories. It's as if God himself comes down to say, "Tara, it's going to be okay. Look at these women in your life. I'm going to do the same for you."

I'm so thankful for my village. I'm thankful for the women in my life who feel a tug at their hearts and share their wisdom with me. I'm thankful that not only are they carrying me, they are going to be such amazing examples to my girls. My girls. It's still sinking in, but I'm not nearly as afraid.

Nineteen weeks left and counting. Let's do this.

xoxo

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Thankful :: December 2014

Nothing like posting a recap of December during the second week of January! I almost made one of my goals for this year to blog more. Then I thought...who am I kidding? This year could be a bit crazy. We're preparing for crazy, anyway. So instead of making blogging more a goal, I'll just be pleasantly surprised if I record more of our memories here than last year.

December was a complete blur. I know it's that way for everyone. So many activities, dinners, celebrations. Throw in shopping, wrapping, and lots of travel. It flew by for us.

This past year was really special. It wasn't the easiest year, necessarily, but I think we really found our groove as a family. As a couple, Todd and I were intentional about spending time together, but also spending time doing things we love as individuals. He spent time with friends and time on the water in his new kayak. My girlfriends and I started a monthly girls night, I went away on two girls overnight trips and I felt less and less guilty for sneaking away for a cup of coffee or a walk around Target on my own. I'm hoping for much for of that in the year to come.

Last year we made growing in God's Word a priority. BSF changed and challenged us and really set the tone of the conversations in our home. I've loved the She Reads Truth studies and Todd and I feel much more equipped to share God's truths than we have in years past. 

December wrapped up 2014 nicely with time spent with friends and family. A busy, but beautiful month.

I've so enjoyed this Thankful series. On hard days, it's nice to look back and remember all of the good that happens in my life that could be easy to overlook. I thank God for the many blessings in my life, the memories I cling to when life throws curve balls. I'm really excited about 2015 and all that it could bring. Even if it's predictable and uneventful, but resembles 2014 even a little bit, I'll be more than grateful.

Goodbye, 2014. Thanks for being so good to us.

xoxo

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Thankful :: November 2014

November inspires all of us to stop and reflect on the many things we have to be thankful for, but this month has given us so many reasons to give thanks. Some big dreams are starting to take shape and prayers have been answered in big ways. Even if those dreams fall through, we feel so encouraged and excited about what the future holds. But I'll get into more about that after the holidays.

What a full month November was. The past few weeks we have felt thankful for...

Little friends who all have November birthdays.

Slow mornings and homemade oatmeal on chilly days.

The great privilege to live (and vote) in a country we love.

Birthday invitations that have become my favorite annual keepsake.

A husband who brings me flowers for no reason.

The last warm days of fall with this girl.

Zoo dates and train rides.

A thoughtful gift from dear friends.

 A future baker.

Another year with her. We celebrated Crosbi's third birthday in Missouri and felt so loved by family who think the world of our little lady.

A girl who knows what she wants. This year, she requested a Paw Patrol party and we were happy to oblige.

Our favorite gift of all.

Thanksgiving at home. It has been many years since we've been in our own home for a major holiday and it was wonderful. Such a sweet time spent with close friends. I can still taste the sweet potato casserole. Yum.

The first year Crosbi could put the star on the tree.

Close friends who mean the world to us and the adventure God has them on.

These people. My heart.

Hope you all had a wonderful November and a very happy Thanksgiving!

xoxo

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Cabin Weekend | July 4th

This past weekend we truly lived life off the grid. No internet, no cell service, no working bathroom. Okay, that last one might be a slight exaggeration, but we definitely unplugged, made memories with our sweet girl, and spent time with a few of our closest friends.

One thing I've been bad about since having Crosbi is recording video. I'm trying to fix that so she'll have lots of home movies to watch as she grows up.

I'm sure we'll watch this one together for years to come.

Hope you all had a happy 4th! So thankful to live in this great country and enjoy such freedom.

xoxo

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Girls Weekend | Jennifer Turns 30

“If you have two friends in your lifetime, you're lucky. If you have one good friend, you're more than lucky.” - S.E Hinton

As we get older it becomes more difficult to make friends. The demands of careers, family and other responsibilities don't give us the flexibility to be out and about meeting new people. It's even more rare as we age to come across people who within months become one of our best friends.

I've mentioned Jennifer before. We worked for the same company, but on different floors and knew each other by name only. But when we learned that we were both pregnant and both due with our first child within days (four days to be exact) of each other, we quickly became inseparable. Every doctor appointment, every symptom, every craving we experienced together. When our babies were born we became even closer. Again, every milestone, every new challenge, every sleepless night we had each other to lean on. So of course my heart broke when she and her family moved to Colorado nearly two years ago. But thanks to the wonder of social media and technology like Facetime, our friendship hasn't skipped a beat. 

For Jenn's 30th birthday her husband surprised her with a trip to Nashville to spend the weekend with me and to see her friends and family. It felt as much my gift as hers. To celebrate we took a short road trip to Alabama. On our way to Huntsville, we made a stop in Mooresville, Alabama, which Southern Living magazine named one of its best small towns in the south. I can easily see how it made the list. So much beauty and history and the sweetest people. We could have sat with the girl working at the coffee shop all day. I called Todd and jokingly told him to look at real estate. Although, I was sort of serious. This is the kind of town I want to grow old in for sure.

We stayed up way too late laughing about the most ridiculous things. We ate good food, went shopping, even saw a movie, which is such a treat when you have kids. Although, Jenn and I totally felt out of our element when we couldn't figure out how to purchase tickets. The theater had assigned seats. Is this a new thing? It made for some good laughs for sure.

On her last day here, I surprised Jenn with a small birthday gathering with old coworkers and friends. I hope she left knowing how much she's loved.

God has blessed me with such incredible women in my life. My girlfriends here in Nashville are much more like sisters than friends. I still stay in touch with my high school and college friends. I don't take these friendships for granted at all. But I love how God can continually bring new people in our lives that forever shape us. 

Thanks for a great weekend, Jenn! I miss you already and can't wait for our next adventure together.

xoxo

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